


We are the ants

by DuEmprise



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Angel/Denom AU, M/M, Transphobia, and suicide, trigger warning: homophobia
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-12-23
Updated: 2017-01-07
Packaged: 2018-09-11 07:34:43
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 1,956
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8969260
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DuEmprise/pseuds/DuEmprise
Summary: Yuuri Katsuki did not want to witness this happen. What was the use of being an angel if he could not even save innocent souls? So he does the unthinkable. And the world begins again, new and brilliant. Until another force appears in a flourish, faster than he can blink. What happens now?





	1. Believe

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fic ever. I've written poetry for years so my writing isn't horrible but my grammar could use some work. I am a bit confident in my ability to write a narrative story so I hope I don't disappoint. This first chapter is very, very short and I apologize. I'm still planning out the plot and such. Also, I am posting this on my phone so I'm not really sure how it'll look on a desktop/laptop. Please let me know if something is awry.

The beginning of my end starts with him. He was beautiful and dark yet always bright before my eyes. 

It had been days of watching from afar. My instincts telling me to run far far away from this marvel of a being. These feelings were nothing to ignore, my heart played it's hard melody and I begun to believe that perhaps I should take my leave. But in such close proximity to him, he who captures my attention so that I cannot look away, my curiosity begets my sense. 

His graceful movements, sure footwork, and beautiful physique; surely no perfection could exist in a world like this. His eyes are closed, lashes so full and lips like heaven, like home. It was ironic. To think a demon could remind me of my home, remind me of my origin. I am an angel although not nearly as sure of my beauty or worth. Always unsure of myself and who I am. My wish was to be someone like him, to be able to stomach myself.

My body moves forward of it's own accord, and I sprawl onto the ground. My mind races with thoughts, too many to count. I am overwhelmed with the anxiety and fear, what a fool I've made of myself! 

I hear his voice. Clear and soft and beautiful, "What do we have here?" 

And then I am gone. I unfurl my wings and launch into the sky. What was I thinking?


	2. Another End

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so this is a flashback?? Kind of but not really, it's more a backstory interrupting the main story but it is IMPORTANT because it lays out some issues that deal later in the story. My plot planning is a little hectic and my chapters are shorter than I would like but this is my first fic. I hope to help myself grow as a writer by using this fic as a stepping stone. Also my grammar is absolutely horrid but I'm a poet so grammar is like something I don't even pay attention to lol. Anyway, please enjoy and leave a comment or kudos please!! It encourages me to keep on writing.

___Phichit Chulanont: Twenty years old and the embodiment of the sun._

_Phichit did not know Yuuri but the angel had been following him for years. Loneliness in humans almost always attracts demons but Phichit was different. It was as if his very being emitted warm sunshine and big smiles as well as deep sadness. But it was not a sadness in which a demon could reap a prize over..no it was the kind that beckoned for help ever so softly. For Phichit, putting on his facade was better for everyone except himself. It was difficult to be heard in the isles of a place that suffocates any sound that doesn't echo happiness._

_And so Yuuri, who knew the same loneliness and sadness, was drawn to the young Thai man. In the beginning, he watched and listened, and hoped that Phichit could somehow feel his presence to know that he was not alone. Yuuri couldn't read minds but the despair painted onto Phichit's face was enough to know that his pain was buried so deep inside his heart that he forgot how to live._

_This was the case for so long, too long. Five years came and went, Phichit who was all softness and kindness could never give it to himself. Five years of grief and suffering and for what? Yuuri knew that someone like this could never do anything to deserve such a horrible way to live._

_Of course, there were times when the brightness in Phichit's eyes would become stronger. It happened so rarely but it still happened. That was worth something, right? Flickers of light in total darkness can guide the way out if you have the strength to follow them. For Phichit, these lights were the times in which he could be himself. It is Phichit in a club holding hands with a cute boy, Phichit in his home covered in his hamsters, Phichit on the ice, skating from dusk until dawn. Perhaps these lights would be nothing but distant blurs for others but they were full of hope to Phichit, full of the want to live in a world that could not stomach the whole of him; A world that wouldn't even try._

_And that was okay, Yuuri used to think. If the world wont try that doesn't mean Phichit couldn't. He would learn soon that the world is an unforgiving entity, full of evil no one could ever forgive or begin to understand._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter will be out by the 29th.


	3. Beauty

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning for descriptions of violence and implied homophobia please take care of yourselves!

_His end begins just as his happiness is born. Phichit had been surrounded by an onslaught of tragedy from mental illness to emotional abuse. For one, he knew that his identity was the root of these problems. To him, being invisible was the same as dying. He read somewhere once that death didn’t result in silence—take the people who have long passed on but still influence the world—but he thinks that silence could certainly be interchangeable with death. So he began to live, really live not just survive; he went to therapy for the first time and slowly learned to love himself again but he still could not bring himself to fully express his very being._

_  
His story, his words, his smile, his life would never be remembered because he was silent. And that is how a soul as beautiful as his could disappear so quietly, in the midst of senseless violence and hate._

_  
Yuuri Katsuki did not want to watch it happen. He didn’t want to watch as they beat Phichit into the ground, didn’t want to witness the way the fear radiated so strongly from his friend that he thought he could touch it. A punch. A kick. Another punch to his head and he fell. A kick to his stomach as Phichit tries to protect himself. They picked his head up to look him in the eyes and in that moment Yuuri saw a broken spirit. Phichit who loved boys and who loved a world so spiteful…_

_  
No….he wouldn’t be gone like this. Never like this, Yuuri thought, and as the once bright light was fading from Phichit’s eyes he made a decision. What was the purpose of being an angel if he could not even save innocent souls? What was his purpose if not to bring justice and safety to those who so rightfully deserve it?_

_  
He spread his wings wide and a stream of golden warmth burst forth. With this he could save Phichit, the human who he had never spoken to but somehow made him so determined to save him._

_  
In the world of angels, Yuuri Katsuki was an anomaly—one of the few who possessed the power to bring back life in exchange for a hundred feathers from his wings. Without his wings he was nothing. Worthless. Doomed. But this did not stop him, he had already saved two others before Phichit. With this final act, he would lose his right wing._

_  
However, as the chorus had stopped and the light faded Yuuri noticed that be still had his wing. What was happening? How is this possible? Did something go wrong? Millions of questions flooded his mind. He should have lost his wing and Phichit should have been revived but he was nowhere to be seen._

_  
Yuuri Katsuki fell to his knees and shed his golden tears for a human who could have rivaled an angel. He thought that the world was so cruel to do this to someone so beautiful. He wondered if maybe he had done more he could have saved Phichit but it was too late to remember regrets or cycle through what-ifs._

  
_He gathered himself and swore he would save the next one. There always seemed to be an abundance of tragedy no matter how much good he tried to spread. It made him feel worthless. What kind of angel was he? He was clumsy and unbeautiful. His gift meant nothing if it didn’t work. And his anxiety isn’t something he should have. He should be perfect like all the other angels. Perfect and not a failure. Oh, the others would no doubt belittle him once he came home...  
but that wasn’t the case._

_  
Yuuri saw a commotion and he wondered what had happened. Maybe they had all gathered to ridicule him? He saw a small figure in the middle of the group but he was too far to be able to discern who it was._

_  
He landed and walked towards the group before stopping…there was no way this could be happening…this really has to be a joke._

_  
The figure stood up and he was beautiful in all his glory. Yuuri remembered that he thought Phichit could rival an angel and it seems that heaven did indeed gain a new angel today._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for being late with this chapter. I had to complete my math review and do some late christmas shopping for myself. I don't proof read anything I write so there's bound to be mistakes but if this story becomes significantly successful then I'll most likely go back and edit my chapters. This story is a mess in my mind so far and I've given up trying to write a plot lmao but I do change my mind frequently so the plot kinda fluctates as I write. The next chapter will probably be posted on Monday or Tuesday.


	4. Meeting

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I sprained my wrist and couldn't write this chapter until I got better. I'm not happy with this one but at the moment it's the best I could do. Also I love long haired Victor so he has long hair in this fic.

Yuuri’s wings brought him up higher and higher. His heart beat so hard he thought it would pop out of his chest…the demon he had been watching was even more magnificent up close but Yuuri had never meant to get that close in the first place.. There’s no telling what a demon could do to him especially now, when he is at his lowest.

 _Yes. it’s better to leave now before something bad happened._ Unfortunately, while Yuuri was caught in his many thoughts he had slowed down and the demon had reached him.  
  
Yuuri stopped completely, flapping his wings to stay in the air, and he blinked. The stranger extended his hand and smiled.  
  
“It’s an honor to meet an angel. My name is Victor.”

Yuuri looked down and quickly stammered out a quiet response.

“Y-You too. My name is Yuuri.”

The stranger had heard him perfectly fine but he said:

“What’s that? I couldn’t quite hear you.”

The demon closed the space between him and Yuuri. He bent his head down and cupped Yuuri’s face.

“Could you repeat that?”

Yuuri’s face shot up and he locked eyes with Victor. His eyelashes were full and he was _beautiful_. His height made Yuuri feel small and his hair was so long and wispy. _Beautiful_..

“Thank you. Most would not call a demon beautiful. And you, an angel, most certainly wouldn’t but it seems that assumption was wrong. I find you quite beautiful, too.”, Victor said with a smile on his face.

Yuuri went red and quickly shook his head.

“No, no, no. I didn’t mean to--I just..”

“You don’t find me beautiful?”

“No! I mean..I do but that wasn’t what I wanted to say. Please forgive me but I have to go now.”

“Why? Isn’t a bit rude to leave so abruptly? Besides, you were watching me and I would think you’d like to spend a little more time by my side.”

Yuuri didn’t know how to respond. Of course a demon would know he was being watched! They had their own mysterious power and Yuuri should have concealed himself. Maybe if he had, he wouldn’t be in this situation. He had to be assertive with Victor even if it meant offending him. Infatuation and admiration for a demon would get him nowhere..Yuuri straightened and prepared his wings for flight.

“I should _really_ leave now. I was simply observing and I had no intention of coming face to face with you. Maybe we’ll meet again, Victor, but I have duties and matters to attend to. Farewell.”

And with that final sentence he disappeared into the high air with a beating heart and adrenaline rushing through his veins. It’s no use, Yuuri thought. This budding emotion he felt couldn’t be nipped. He could only hope it wouldn't grow into something far larger. He had enough of heartbreak and being left behind. He wouldn't let it happen again and yet this demon, _Victor_ , had managed to capture his attention with such beautiful movements. It was hopeless. Yuuri would have to endure as long as it took. 

*********

Victor watched Yuuri as he shot up and he laughed.

“Well, well. An angel thinks I’m beautiful…an _angel_.”

Victor was no fool but it’s said that love could always blind the most intelligent beings. Perhaps, that blindness is not weakness but a path to greatness. Time would only tell but Victor had little time left. He made his own decision.

_To love and to live once again._

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter will probably take some time too because my finals are coming up but after that, chapters will be posted every two or three days. Please keep in mind that I am using this story to progress as a writer so it may or may not reach the expectations of those who read it. I really hope it does though.


End file.
